


new year's resolutions and why not to make them

by mildlyobsessive



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, New Year's Eve, Phan Drabble, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 14:09:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5589097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mildlyobsessive/pseuds/mildlyobsessive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Year after year Dan sat in the corner of whatever b-list party he'd manage  to acquire an invitation to, watching it all unfold and wondering how no one saw how ignorant they were.  It was preposterous; the idea that a year, of all things, could change your life.</p><p>Dan had thought that six years ago tonight as he had listened to his friends counting down, watched 2008 morph into 2009.</p><p>But then 2009 decided that it just <em>had</em> to prove him wrong, hadn't it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	new year's resolutions and why not to make them

**Author's Note:**

> This is not good. Just throwing that out there. It's just insomnia combined with 'oh shit yeah it's New year's eve' with a dash of gay. Okay, maybe more than a dash.
> 
> Also, it's full of sarcastic mini-references, so no I'm not crazy, and yes it was intentional.

It's New Years Eve, a holiday that he used to despise. It was pointless, really. People bedazzled with so many sequins his eyes burned, laughing and drinking, and all of them, every single one, making promises and wishes and goals for the next 365 days. But that wasn't the problem. No, what rubbed Dan the wrong way about the whole New Years extravaganza was its repitive, and therefore useless, nature. Every year, the same people at the same parties vowing to complete all these tasks, like this _particular_ year was different from the last. Like changing their calender would make them a new person.

No one ever noticed how ironic it was. They just made their wishes and chugged their drinks and screamed as the ball dropped in Times Square because yay, shiny things are fun. And then they would all go home and forget their promises and carry on writing the wrong year on papers for four months. But they'd sure as hell be back next year, shimmery and excited and ridiculously confident that _this_ would be the year everything changed.

Year after year this happened, and year after year Dan sat in the corner of whatever b-list party he'd managed to acquire an invitation to, watching it all unfold and wondering how no one saw how ignorant they were. It was preposterous; the idea that a year, of all things, could change your life.

Dan had thought that six years ago tonight as he had listened to his friends counting down, watched 2008 morph into 2009.

But then 2009 decided that it just _had_ to prove him wrong, hadn't it?

Because with 2009 came Phil Lester, and damn, he really did change everything.

Honestly, Dan wasn't even _religious_ , but he felt that there had to be some kind if divine intervention involved when the creepy stalker fan of YouTuber somehow manages to become best friends with said YouTuber. Because that right there is some fanfiction type shit.

It just doesn't _happen_.

…

New Year's Eve 2009 was spent on Skype with Phil, the TV counting down to 2010 in the background. "Happy new year!" Phil had exclaimed.

Dan laughed. "What, no new year's kiss? I'm disappointed."

Phil had blushed, red very obvious on his pale skin. "I would have…I didn't think…"

"Hey, I was joking. Well…kind of, but whatever."

"Kind of?"

Now it was Dan's turn to blush. "You know, to be fair, I think I gave you plenty of hints last time I visited."

"I got nervous!" Phil protested.

Dan had giggled, an honest to goodness real-life giggle, which should have embarrassed him more than it did. "I guess we'll just have to call a raincheck on that new year's kiss, then."

"Agreed."

And for just a moment, Dan had to concede that maybe New Year's Eve wasn't the absolute worst holiday ever.

…

But now it's New Year's Eve 2015, and Dan has actually ventured outside of his and Phil's apartment (gasp) for something besides exotic trips to foreign countries that somehow don't count as 'going outside.'

He's at a party with some of the biggest youtubers on the planet and he's actually _enjoying himself_.

That doesn't change the fact that everyone's making those preposterous resolutions, with Louise vowing to clean out her _entire_ house and Joe just going on about getting laid. Chances are, neither of those things will happen. (Well, maybe Joe's will. I mean have you _seen_ Joe Sugg, for God's sake?) But, for some reason, it doesn't bother him.

It's probably because he's happier now than he was back then, or that he's finally seen that there's a point in wishing. And both of those things are true. But he's danisnotonfire, after all, and he has to make a deep philosophical point about this.

And so, maybe, just maybe, everyone knows that they won't actually go to the gym three times a week or conquer the world or whatever. Maybe it's just about hoping that next year will be better than the previous one was, and hoping that they can improve along with it. 

After all, you never really know when you're 2009's coming, do you?

Dan's interrupted by Phil excitedly grabbing his hand as everyone starts to count down.

10 … _Holy shit, he's enjoying New Years Eve_

9 … _like actually enjoying it_

8… _philosophy aside HE'S HAVING FUN_

7 … _fuck, he's also holding hands with Phil Lester_

6 … _the person he fucking FANBOYED over_

5 … _it's not like hand holding is uncommon for them, it just hits Dan hard sometimes_

4 … _now is one of those times_

3 … _oh shit there's only three seconds left of 2015_

2 … _the best year if his life's about to be over_

1 … _who knows? maybe 2016 will be better. Or worse. You never really know, after all_

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

There's cheering and confetti swirling around Dan in a dizzying haze, and he can hear the deafening boom of fireworks above. One of the many perks of living in London.

He turns to Phil, suddenly. "I just remembered something."

Phil gives him a perplexed look "What?"

"We never did call in that raincheck on that new year's kiss."

Phil laughs. "What, did all the other ones over the last six years not count?" 

"No!" Dan exclaims. "This was a very particular, _very special_ kiss, and I insist I get it."

The room is swimming in the din of extremely intoxicated/extremely happy people. Dan can barely hear himself think. But when Phil leans in to give the kiss that was promised six years ago and Dan whispers "Happy New Year," he knows Phil heard him. And he knows he understood.


End file.
